Phobias, Counterphobias and Other Habits - Just another day at EarlyBirds Toastmasters

Dear Members, Guests and Friends:

 

As TopicMaster, I started us off with some phobias and it soon became confusingly clear that some people have a phobia of the phobia:

 

• TM Jose suffers from a phobia of arachibutyrophobia (the fear of peanut butter) since his basic diet consists of peanut butter and pancakes, backed by heavy doses of statins.
• TM Jim resists ataxophobia (the fear of disorder) – by filing his taxes in a very orderly fashion and he is now on a first-name basis with his IRS auditor.
• TM Paolo has the onset of ephebiphobia (fear of teenagers) which is the #1 phobia worldwide for anyone who is not a teenager.  “Dio me salve!”, he implores of fate and the universe.
• TM Aleta avoids octophobia (fear of figure 8) but suffers from chapodiphobia (fear of octopi) especially in their male human version.  All those arms… with suckers, to boot!
• TM Carmine overcame allodoxaphobia (fear of opinions) by sharing several existential opinions with us within the 2-minute time limit. Open casket or closed casket? It all depends on the state of the teeth.  “A man’s reach is greater than his grasp – or what’s a heaven for?”  But I digress.
• TM Joe fears having to pronounce atychiphobia (fear of failure) which tailspinned us like a wheel within a wheel, never ending or beginning on an ever-spinning reel.  He Won Best Table Topics Award.
• DTM Mary Helen conquered her gamophobia (fear of marriage) by running into a humorous Toastmaster being served Italian wedding soup at a local diner on her wedding day.  Astrology is the name of the game.

 

We had an icebreaker today….

 

• TM Marie guided us through her daily routine which begins promptly at the time most of us retire for the evening.   Centering Prayer has eliminated the jargon from her inner dialogue and her body now actually whispers back to her to please hit the Snooze button.  She Won Best Speaker Award.

 

We then had an evaluation…

 

• TM Pam praised TM Marie for the flow and continuity of her speech and for challenging all of us to send a poll to our bodies and listen to the feedback.  She knows her own body is waiting to hear that she, Pam, will start taking care of it, oh, any day now.  She Won Best Evaluator Award.

 

Zoom Master Report:

 

• TM Paolo, unknowingly suffering from atelophobia (fear of imperfection) praised DTM Kip’s suspenders against the background of the unseen but imagined Jasper, Georgia mountain range and remarked that TM Marie was perfectly well centered to explain Centering Prayer, which could only be topped by wearing a white linen blouse in the pristine tropical beach backdrop.

 

 

The Word of the Day was

 

FLOTILLA, noun

(Mispronounced FLOTILA phonetically – it’s FLOTIYA phonetically)

1. A fleet of ships or boats; 2 or more squadrons of small warships (such as the Dunkirk evacuation, the retaking of the Falkland Islands, or the Mariel boatlift more recently)

2. An indefinitely large number.

 

We conducted our annual Club Elections and after a very intense,  highly competitive campaign, the results are finally in:

 

President – TM Paolo

VP Education – DTM Kip , per secula seculorum

Treasurer – DTM Jim D.

Secretary – TM Tom

VP Membership – DTM Mary Helen

VP Public Relations – TM Chris

Sargeant-at-Arms – TM Randolph

Immediate Past President – TM Jeff

 

Inauguration Ceremony will be held on Thursday, June 24 at 7 am.   The new officers will officially begin their term on July 1.

 

Next week we will have a Hybrid Meeting – DTM Kip, DTM Mary Helen, TM Jim G., TM Chris will be transmitting from the Back Room in our old Denny’s on Powerline and Oakland Park Blvd.  Denny’s has managed to maintain its ambiance throughout this time and is avidly waiting to serve their legendary Skillets.

 

For the rest of us, see you Zoom!  Same login applies.

 

Video link for today’s meeting http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_kNuTetANw

 

Respectfully submitted,

Ana I.

Recap Writer

 

 

 

Captain Grammar, Acceptance and Memories - fun confusion at EarlyBirds

 

Dear Members, Friends and Guests,

 

TM Aleta started us off with popcorn-style eulogies at the funeral of Captain Grammar, lying lifelessly before our very eyes. 

 

• TM Pam reminisced about her favorite hero – Sleeping Beauty, who had to deal with Seven Dwarfs.  All Pam’s granddaughter wants to know is why can’t Granma cook?
• DTM Kip embarked on a dissertation of daily deficiencies as a husband which ultimately took the life of the dearly departed Captain.
• TM Tom pointed out that the Captain called his ex-wives Plaintiffs since he has forgotten all their names.  There’s just too much bourbon in Kentucky.
• TM Jeff is planning his bachelor party in St. Augustine where the Fountain of Youth recently gushes out bourbon.
• TM Jim G. does not imbibe bourbon and is Captain Grammar himself, alive and well.
• DTM Jim D. realized Captain Grammar died because he couldn’t follow Table Topic instructions, moved to Las Vegas and got heavily into debt.  DTM Jim pondered if Captain Grammar was assisted by another in his demise – as he was unable to pay his EarlyBird dues…
• DTM Mary Helen was appalled at the emotionally frozen paid mourners at this wake, and stated that Captain Grammar died because of the current state of the grammar lexicon.   She Won Best Table Topics Award.

 

Along came prepared speeches…

 

• TM Jeff accepted the Presidency of another Club where he wants to emulate a polifacetic member.  He Won Best Speaker Award.
• In a tandem ride, TM Jose and TM Ana took us down their memory lane, back to high school in the ketchup-deficient, Wonderless Bread, ice-cube averse, free-flowing beer tap miniskirt universe that was Madrid in the 60s.

 

Regarding evaluations….

 

• DTM Kip encouraged TM Jeff to rally the troops to support him since they’re a captive audience anyway.
• DTM Mary Helen praised TM Jose’s presentation skills and how they evoked her own shared memories of miniskirts, long haired musicians, drugs and rock & roll.  Tudo Bem, Tudo Bom, as they say in Portuguese.  She Won Best Evaluator Award.
• TM Tom missed the sex part in drugs and rock & roll in today’s speech but is looking forward to enjoying the sprinkles on a chocolate frosted doughnut while listening  to the sequel.

 

 

To add to the confusion, The Word of the Day was

 

LIE

As opposed to LAY, LIED, LAIN

 

Lay is a verb that commonly means “to put or set (something) down.” Lie is a verb that commonly means “to be in or to assume a horizontal position” (or “to make an untrue statement,” but we’ll focus on the first definition). In other words, lay takes a direct object, and lie does not. As for the misconceptions, well, when you look at the two verbs next to each other in different tenses, it becomes a bit more obvious where the confusion is.

 

Example:  We hereby officially declare childhood nursery rhyme “As I lay me down to sleep” and myriads of songs such as  “Lay, Lady, Lay” “As I lay down” FORMALLY CANCELLED.

 

Elections are next week!  You must be present to decline.  Just sayin’…..

 

link to recording:    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_VINws3Jxso

 

See you next week!

 

Ana

Recap Writer

Giants Behind Faces, Down Memory Lane and Lots of Spurtles - a fun meeting at Early Birds

Dear Members, Guests and Friends,

 

TM Carmine spurtled our thoughts about skills learned at Toastmasters.  We found out that….

 

• TM Paolo has become a keen observer of vocal variety and nuance, skills that now border on perfect although not always present.
• TM Jeff’s presidential duties have taught him to decipher toddlers’ undecipherable language.
• I, Recap Ana, am not certain about the impact of anything, other than the fact that I have a blast writing zany recaps.
• TM Jonathan, perennial driver,  visits clubs mostly to announce that they have earned Distinguished President’s Award.  We were no exception.
• TM Jose has vastly spurtled his use of crutch words by vividly thinking of us, EarlyBirds, when presenting a work seminar.  He Won Best Table Topics Award.
• TM Chris loves being a tech watcher because unlike her professional life audience,  she connects with us at our meetings.
• TM Jim G. embraces technology and likes to stir the pot with a spurtle although he concedes the real spurtle master is Chris.

 

The prepared speeches today provided variety and like a good spurtle, stirred our pot and our senses….

 

• TM Randolph broke out in song (to the tune of This Is A Man’s World by James Brown).   Oh and how true the message is!   He Won Best Speaker Award.
  
  

This is a man's world, this is a man's world
But it wouldn't be nothing, nothing without a woman or a girl

You see, man made the cars to take us over the road
Man made the train to carry the heavy load
Man made electric light to take us out of the dark
Man made the boat for the water, like Noah made the ark

This is a man's, man's, man's world
But it wouldn't be nothing, nothing without a woman or a girl

 

• DTM Kip took us down memory lane to the Old Trading Post, where Asian Bistros were allowed to take over those snotty French Cafes in historic Las Olas Boulevard.  In one of them, he married the girl of his dreams – after signing a corporate prenup which has helped the marriage stay strong and has kept those shares intact.

 

As for the evaluations….

 

• TM Marie praised TM Randolph for his speech, with its plethora of information, vocal variety, inspiration and fun facts.  She especially liked the fact that he implemented her suggestions from her first evaluation – a rare occurrence in these instances.    She Won Best Evaluator Award, hands down.
• TM Tom was awed by DTM Kip’s ability to knit together an excellent yarn and he, Tom, got so caught up in his own weave that the cat of Tall Tale fame reappeared and made him lose track of all time.   According to trustworthy sources, he is still evaluating Kip at 9:17 am Eastern Standard Time.

 

Our Toastmaster of the Day, TM Aleta, the woman with many last names,  graciously, good-naturedly and smoothly ran our meeting.   She is one of our group’s Zoom gifts!

 

Tech Watcher TM Jim G. verbally recapped the entire meeting and, without mentioning names,  poignantly reminded the undersigned to get my act together regarding screen sharing.  Awright already….

 

Zoom Watcher TM Barone poetically awarded TM Marie  the Best Zoom Screen Ribbon for her perfectly centered position in a corner angle room with sunrays highlighting her golden tresses and silk blouse.  He also casually alerted the group that TM Randolph’s company prints moolah.  Just sayin’.

 

Timer TM Jose actually hurled a Spanish Spurtle (‘chorro’) across the virtual Atlantic Ocean to those who overstepped their time limits.   It was inadvertently caught by TM Paolo in Italian (“mestolo”, “schizarre”).

 

The Way Overused Word of the Day was

 

SPURTLE, noun

 

A wooden Scottish kitchen tool, dating from the 15^th century, that is used to stir porridge, soups, stews and broths (and to discipline young ‘uns, prior to the Age When Parents Became Afraid Of Their Kids).

 

Recording link - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ge6JMSGmRE

 

Remember:  Group Elections are the last Thursday of May.  Available positions are

President       

VP Education

Secretary

Treasurer

VP Public Relations

VP Marketing

Sargeant-at-Arms

 

Feel free to ask the current officers for more information about the position that interests you.

 

See you next week!

 

Ana

Recap Writer

 

Too Big To Believe - Or Too Great To Ignore - Tall Tales at Early Birds

Dear Members, Guests and Friends,

 

Our Tall Tales started off with…

 

• DTM Kip as The Pied Piper of Las Olas following a beautiful store owner and ending up with a brass rat.
• TM Tom building solid intraspecies relationships in his own private Garden of Eden. Visiting DTM Lois is moving into his back yard!
• I, Ana, recounted the story of Havana’s Gentleman from Paris, who rafted to South Florida and transformed into Barry Gibb.
• TM Aleta theatrically gardened  as Avid Gardner who splashed alcohol down her throat to remove snake toxins in a case of domestic violence while married to Ole Blue Eyes.   She Won Best Speaker Award.
• TM Marie took us in an interplanetary 3D acid trip of dreamers, tossers, turners, skywalkers, moonwalkers and skull collectors – while her hubby and tabby slept peacefully next to her.
• TM Carmine introduced us to all the dead people he knows who have turned him into a voracious reader.  He shoots for the moon and if he misses, he ends up with the stars.

 

And inverting the order of things,  we then had sequential Table Topics, wherein we embarked on a roller coaster ride:

 

• DTM Kip obsessively talked about a ruckus in an Asian Restaurant ….
• TM Chris looked through the window and saw TM Beckyjo in the midst of the ruckus and decided to walk to the (closed for renovation) Floridian, only to notice there were no cars
• TM Paolo wanted to forget about hot air balloons in Arizona and focus get invited to the scrumptious breakfast being prepared for Kip, when he remembered we are on Zoom…
• TM Randolph deep-sixed the hot air balloons going to Spain and instead decided to find out that the Las Olas commotion was because the snakes and the brass rats were eating the cat…
• DTM Lois found a garden snake wrapped around a glistening Brass Rat statue….
• TM Jim G. pondered about finding snakes in gardens, when alligators in The Everglades are overwhelmed by the itty bitty pet snakes turning into swamp reptiles.

 

Evaluations/General Evaluation:  DTM Lois gave incisive individual evaluations with audience participation.  Thank you for visiting us today!

 

Zoom Tech Report:   TM Jim G. is totally captivated by the little square boxes on the screen.  The end.

 

According to Chat Room rumor, TM Pam’s internet was taken hostage by gremlins.  It’s not a Tall Tale!       P.S.  Phone home!!!!

 

The Word of the Day was

 

DEEP SIX, noun

 

To abandon, reject, or otherwise get rid of. This slangy term dates from the mid-1900s and originated in the navy, where it meant throwing something or someone overboard. The “six” refers to the six-foot nautical fathom, the standard unit of measurement for sea depth.

 

Example:  To deep six in the Army is simply unfathomable.

 

Recording can be found here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y94h57HROdc

 

Next week, we’re back to our usual moderate fibbing.

 

Ana

Recap Writer

 

 

Obscure Idioms, Poo-Bahs, Giants and Replanning Life - an interesting morning at EarlyBirds

Dear Members, Guests and Friends:

 

TM Tom boggled our minds with obscure idioms that no one has ever heard of:

 

• DTM Mary Helen affably wishes that, besides having the common touch, she could have more vocal regulators in the U-Haul of life.
• TM Aleta pondered about the Aborigenes who practice (/ˈkuːiː/) , a shout originated in Australia to attract attention, find missing people, or indicate one's own location. The word "cooee" originates from the Dharug language of Aboriginal Australians in the Sydney area. ... It means "come here" and has now become widely used in Australia as a call over distances.  She also complained that her metal roof is very noisy during hailstorms in Western Pennsylvania.
• I, Ana, evoked those distant days of raising  children, who are expert at crocodile tears to manipulate their way through life.  I was trained not to believe adult Poo-Bahs and their crocodile tears!  I Won Best Table Topics Award.
• DTM Kip broke into song when asked if he's ever been cruel to be kind.  Check it out!  https://youtu.be/b0l3QWUXVho
• TM Carmine 'fessed up that, while in his cups, he was a book cooker until the Grand Poo-Bahs of External Revenue took him down an Emeril notch.
• TM Jim G.  cudgels his brain – not easy to do – as he brings in the EarlyBird banner and all such accoutrements of the Sargeant-At-Arms.
• TM Jose fondly took us back to the Moorish conquest of Spain – which lasted a mere 900 years- which still takes the blame for Spaniards' food sharing poor habits.  It's all forgiven because they later invented tapas.
• TM Marie reminded us that ALL of us, Poo-Bahs and Non-Poo-Bahs, are in the dress rehearsal before the final curtain drops. Let's practice!

 

As far as prepared speeches go….

 

• DTM Jim D. forgot that he had retired… 7 times… and is loving his current work at a friend's airline with a periodic commute to… Anchorage! From Harleys to jetliners… it's all in a day's work and a variety of virtual backgrounds!
• TM Randolph reminded us of what we already knew:  behind every Poo-Bah in history, there's been a Mrs. Grand Poo-Bah or a Mommy Grand Poo-Bah.  Fullstop.  He Won Best Speaker Award.

 

In the realm of evaluations…

 

• TM Aleta thoroughly enjoyed DTM Jim D.'s speech and marveled at his non-negotiation pause skills which landed him a very lucrative job!
• TM Marie admired TM Randolph's praise of noteworthy female Poo-Bahs and encouraged him to incorporate a personal story to make a great speech more impactful.  She Won Best Evaluator Award.

 

Zoom Watcher TM Paolo  keenly watched us,  and reported that:

 

• Virtual backgrounds enhance or detract from our communication.  He gave us some easy, failsafe formulas to properly position ourselves in our Zoom screens:

 

• Distance Formula: d=√(x₁ – x₂)² + (y₁ – y₂)² ...
• Slope Formula: Slope = y₂ – y₁ / x₂ – x₁ ...
• Slope Intercept: y=mx+b. ...
• Midpoint Formula: (x₁+x₂) / 2, (y₁+y₂) / 2.

TM Paolo  personally favors corner-angle real backgrounds which give depth to the pie r squared area of the room.    <![if !vml]><![endif]><![if !vml]><![endif]>

 

In case you didn't guess the Word of the Day yet, I encourage you to cudgel your brain = think hard.  Something's definitely amiss.

 

POO-BAH, noun

1. A person holding many public or private offices.
2. A person in high position of great influence.

 

Example:  We are all Poo-Bahs in our own legendary minds.

 

YouTube Link for today's recording-http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Io15OBfllQo

 

See you next week at Tall Tales!

 

Ana

Recap Writer

Earth Day, Earth Day, Earth Day and Robert's Rules of Order - today at EarlyBirds

Dear Members, Guests and Friends,

 

TM Lorena started the meeting with an inspirational Zulu invocation regarding UBUNTU, which means “I am because we are” – translated into 2021 USA vernacular,  “sharing is caring”, or “step aside and let’s all sustain the candy!!”.

 

TopicMaster Jeff led us in Earthly themed table topics….

 

• TM Lorena profusely thanked the Earth for the sunrise, the warmth and the raindrops that keep falling on her head and keep her hair nice and curly.
• I, Ana, proudly divvy up recyclables into 3 categories as prescribed by the City of Fort Lauderdale and that’s a long way from growing up in Madrid amidst sunflower seed shells and shrimp corpses in tapas bars.
• DTM Kip is the proud owner of a Prius which specializes in reining in drifty seniors who are loose on I-95 and this car simply takes him where he needs to go.
• TM Chris highly praised technology and its influence on a healthy environment, especially their favorite RV home away from home.
• DTM Jim D. and DTM Mary Helen, popularly known as the DTMs (Day ToastMasters) practice premeditated driving to control their carbonated footprints.  He Won Best Table Topics Award.
• Guest Ariadna reported that her country of origin, Peru,  has had to increase imports of eyedrops, since  pharmacies and drugstores constantly run out due to PWES (pollution watery eye syndrome).

 

And then came the prepared speeches…

• TM Jose regaled us with a tongue-twister of a speech about drivetrains, powertrains, front wheel and rear wheel drives, and it was all started by the trusted 1966 Oldsmobile Toronado.  Who knew???
• TM Jim G. reminisced about 1970’s first Big Environmental Push and rode his bike 16 miles to school to prove to his Dad that he could compete with  the old parental sob story of ‘walking uphill in the snow to get to school’.  So there!  He Won Best Speaker Award.
• TM Aleta made a motion to prevent hissing, coughing or spitting at any time during a Bored Meeting (errr… that is, Board Meeting), seconded her own motion, discussed it, voted on it and although a minority voice (Aleta’s counterpoint) was heard, the majority (Aleta) prevailed. It’s the best way to run a meeting – by discussion, vote and unanimity, loosely.

 

As far as evaluations….

• TM Tom instantaneously gave Jose the honorary title of Engineer and Head Researcher at EarlyBirds, who can easily sell ice to eskimos.
• Visiting TM Andrew praised TM Jim G.’s masterful use of visuals, pausing, pacing, voicing over a storytelling weave of Earthly disintegration.
• DTM Mary Helen declared TM Aleta Consiglieri of the Godmother Order of Business and Professional Women of the Red Light District 12.  She Won  Best Evaluator Award.

 

Although I was not asked, I won’t take it personally, and here is my first-ever Zoom Master report:

• EarlyBirds can be divided into 4  Zoom categories:  a) solid color backgrounds, b)  intellectual backgrounds (libraries with stepladders, binoculars on tripods, c) action-packed backgrounds (Star Wars, bikers’ picnics or biker rest area)  and d) assorted background messaging (commercial,  philosophical, and undetermined)
• In my book, we are a Zoom-A+ Club as we do not maniacally ask “Can you hear me?” every time it’s our turn to speak. 
• During one evaluation there was background noise of a keyboard stroke nature.  Antidote:  Keep yourselves muted at all times.
• Election Fraud took place today.  Not sure about anybody else, but I voted at least 4 times for Best Evaluator.  Just sayin’…..

 

The Word of the Day was

SUSTAINABLE, adj.

Able to be maintained at a certain level

Example:  In order to be a sustainable Club,  which Officer Position do YOU want to stand for in June’s election?  Geez.  (Ask Kip for job descriptions).

Requirements:  Regular attendance, willingness and having a pulse.

 

YouTube Recording of this meeting is at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VIGwyS9ou70

 

See you next week!

 

Ana I.

Recap Writer

The Oscars, Valuing Others, Jobs and Learning Labs, all in a day's EarlyBirds meeting

Dear Members, Guests and Friends,

 

TM Aleta walked us down the Red Carpet of Tinseltown….

 

• DTM Jim D. thinks most Hollywood award winners belong in the 12-Step program of those who can’t stop talking – called On and On and On.  Use that mute button, somebody, please!!
• TM Pam revealed that she had a risqué grandmother who had a torrid affair with debonair, hunky, stud of studs Charlie Chaplin…. And his mustache!  Oh if we only told our descendants half of what we did while in our prime!   She Won Best Table Topics Award.
• I, Ana, would like to star in a biography titled My Life As A Katherine Hepburn Wannabe, and my wardrobe would consist of pantsuits, while my props would be married Catholic men.
• TM Jose prefers to take long walks but ‘fessed up to watching -at times- gruesome miniseries about current events – they are more accurate than the actual news! He reminisced about the good old days of movie censorship under Generalissimo Franco -who is still dead- when kiss scenes were obliterated and no one in the country understood any movie plots.
• TM Paolo agrees with General Patton, who thought the Oscars are a 2-hour meat market anyway,  and who refused to rise from his grave to accept the award for his no-show portrayer, George C. Scott. 
• TM Carmine’s favorite child actor is Dopey, but his all-time favorite is the cartoon character Carmine who marvels at how people live vicariously through other people’s dopey lives.

 

Today we had extraordinary prepared speeches….

 

• TM Lorena spoke about valuing others and not treating them as invisible beings, much like adults did with us when we were children.  Gossiping behind their back is a socially acceptable practice in HOA circles.
• TM Jim G. regaled us with a whirlwind tour of his job history which was quite remarkable for someone who doesn’t even like to work.  He’s simply a Jim Of All Trades, Master of Computers.
• TM Marie outdid herself as a Level 5 Visionary Communicator all right, full of props, metamorphosing in plain view and nearly blowing up the learning lab with a candle blowing in the wind.  She was last spotted at the grocery store buying a case of pineapples to ship out to her fans.  She Won Best Speaker Award.

 

As far as evaluations go….

 

• TM Jeff praised TM Lorena for the quality of her speech, which included a moral of the story, although he would have preferred that she flat out sue the Board of her HOA for cruel and unnecessary shortsightedness and be done with it.
• TM Aleta -like the rest of us- appreciates the fact that his career in a multitude of polifacetic jobs in Joisy -including saxtuba player in a marching band- landed him in his true calling – EarlyBird TM trusted tech guru and lasting friend.
• TM Joe -also like the rest of us- was awed by TM Marie’s trajectory down 5 levels of Pathways as a Visionary Communicator, which transformed her into a powerful speaker and propmeister– all while under the influence of rose wine, indigestion from eating too much pineapple and hot wax burns from lit candles.  She Won Best Speaker Award.

 

The Word of the Day was

 

FOCUS, noun

 

In geometrical optics, a focus, also called an image point, is a point where light rays originating from a point on the object converge. Although the focus is conceptually a point, physically the focus has a spatial extent, called the blur circle.

 

For the rest of us non-geometrical opticians, it means “get with the program”.

 

Ex.:  Seances are also called hocus-focus.

 

Recording Link for today’s meeting http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jci_v3wmQ24

 

See you next week!

 

Ana I.

Recap Writer

Idioms, Icebreaker, Patio Control and The Hills of Tipperary, a fun morning at Early Birds

 

Dear Members, Guests and Friends,

 

TM Carmine chose his favorite American idioms as Table Topics.  We discovered that…

 

• TM Jim G. is tired of all the red tape he encounters everywhere except when he wants to do some Christmas gift-wrapping – then it’s nowhere to be found.
• TM Paolo thinks in order to drive a hard bargain, in Italy you must practice the old Renaissance adage “qui la dura, la vince”.  He resolutely parla italiano until the red light appears.
• DTM Mary Helen has crushed some people’s Achilles’ heel but later mended fences by gifting them a free pedicure.
• TM Joe’s Dad thought Joe found his buddies and dates by scraping the bottom of the barrel.  Ahhhh those lovely teenage years….
• TM Marie likes dressing to the nines and dreams of her husband daintily carrying her from her beach chaise to the ocean, much like the beach boys did to Bo in the timeless movie “10”. 
• I (Ana) did not know the origin of passing the buck, I simply know that in Spain it’s a national pastime and you don’t have to scrape the bottom of the barrel to injure your heel.   I Won Best Table Topics Award For Most Incomprehensible Table Topic.
• DTM Jim D. prefers to be in the front seat, namely Harley, not Davidson.

 

And then came the anticipated speeches…

 

• TM Randolph delighted us with a lovely icebreaker, where his faith, loyalty, kindness and gentleness shone through.  Like many of us, he’s on a pilgrimage to find the User Manual for Parents.  He Won Best Speaker Award.
• TM Jeff was literally all hands on deck to fix his crumbling yard and patio, where his little dog stuck her paw.  PETA intervened, sent along Manuel and his Dos Amigos, who bought the equivalent of Mt Everest worth of sod, and the rest, as they say, is fodder for Pathways.
• TM Tom took us on a pilgrimage of his Pathways trajectory, starting with the sinking of the Costa Concordia to be blamed on the Captain’s paramour, a bella signora de la notte, only to realize that It’s a long way to Tipperary.

 

As far as evaluations…

 

• TM Tom praised TM Randolph for creating a strong emotional connection through the screen and delivering a nearly perfect speech ironically titled “Why I’m Not Perfect”.
• TM Marie commended TM Jeff for motivating us to take another look at our decades-long To Do Lists – and then set them aside.  Gusto will give it added zest!!  She Won Best Evaluator Award.
• DTM Kip said to TM Tom that the secret to success is to knock off a Pathways project conclusion a year, and the rest is a mere pilgrimage.

 

TM Paolo, as first-time Zoom Master, delivered a full baritono rendition of the opera O Sole Mio, A Virtual Background.  Congratulazioni!

 

The Word of the Day was

 

PILGRIMAGE, noun

The journey of a pilgrim, especially one to a shrine or sacred place.

 

Example:  In the olden days, Early Bird Toastmasters undertook a pilgrimage to The Shrine of Denny’s every Thursday morning, rain or shine - Thanksgiving Day (reluctantly) excluded.

 

 

Here’s the link to today’s YouTube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a00CgAz96n8

 

 

See you next week!

 

Ana I.

Recap Writer

April Fools, Rose All Day, Greek and Unwanted - what a morning at Early Birds!

Dear Members, Friends and Guests,

 

In honor of April Fools’ Day, I started us off with some pertinent Table Topics:

 

• TM Jose confessed that he laughed when others fell in icy Madrid, only to find himself landing on the cold hard ice and being the object of derision from others.  Oh that pesky Karma!!
• TM Joe tricked his now wife into thinking that their date was a bet, and now, after 20 years of (happy) marriage, she knows that he married her on a bet!!
• TM Lorena has been able to switch her work schedule so she can stay till the end of our meetings.   Her bosses think it’s just a prank on April Fools’ Day!
• TM Jim G. solemnly stated that he will not attempt to trick the IRS on April 15, especially since the IRS has postponed tax filing day till June!   He Won Best Table Topics Award.
• TM Chris started an April Fools’ Blog last year inspired by the pandemic, but her wildest imagination could not have matched the reality of what was to come!
• DTM Mary Helen lives by  the phrase ‘fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.”  She’s a big fan of renowned prankster George Clooney, who was recently pranked by his wife with a dirty diaper switcharoo in complicity with their alert twins.

 

And then came amazing prepared speeches….

 

• TM Paolo delighted us with an early morning degustation (aka Rose Renaissance)  of Cote de Roses, which goes through a short process of maceration of seeds, stems, crushed red grapes and Paolo can’t bring himself to throw away the beautiful empty bottles.  A questo punto, he has had to buy a Public Storage facility to keep the empty bottles.  Mamma Mia!

 

 

<![if !supportLists]>·     <![endif]>TM Tom impressed us with his solid knowledge of Greek στάθμευσε το αυτοκίνητό σου 

Which he used on his eccentric rogue Polish neighbor but alas, it impressed the Pole too  – after 20 years, the covered car disappeared from the street never to be seen again.  Go Condo HOA!!

• Guest TM JOB Mogire made a heart-rendering speech about the hardships and isolation he endured growing up and how he was able to let the pain instruct him, rather than destruct him.  Good luck in the contest!  You are well on your way to a win!  Come visit us again.  He Won Best Speaker Award.

 

As for evaluations…

 

• TM Aleta absolutely loved TM Paolo’s wine tasting class and was subsequently spotted headed for the nearest Wine & Spirits in West Pennsylvania.
• DTM Kip is brimming with pride that TM Tom has reached Level 5 of Pathways, and is proposing Lasik surgery for Tom to avoid eyeglass glare on the camera lens.
• Back with great gumption, TM Carmine praised Guest TM JOB for his touching speech and will propose  to TM International to start giving out prizes to Mentors of Speech Winners at Contests.  He Won Best Evaluator Award.

 

The Word of the Day was

 

GUMPTION, noun

 

shrewd or spirited initiative and resourcefulness.

 

Example: 

 

It takes gumption to be the minority opinion in any controversial discussion.

 

Recording for the meeting http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rrkwlt-5dhw

 

See you next week!

 

Ana

Recap Writer

This or that, days of wine and olives, panel on leadership - very accountable morning in EarlyBirds

Dear Members, Guests and Friends,

 

TM Jim G. made us ponder about the imponderables of life – would you rather this or that?  And thus we learned that…

 

• TM Randolph chooses Time over Money simply because with more Time, he would figure out a way to make more Money….
• I, Ana, have been stuck in a ski lift, swinging in mid air, wondering why, as a hot-blooded Cuban, I didn’t get stuck parasailing in the Caribbean instead!
• DTM Mary Helen would rather be an adult with childlike enthusiasm or be a child to get to meet her parents again – with the perspective of an adult.  Oh this is very clearly confusing!
• TM Pam would rather slowly move forward because there’s been enough dang Pause in 2020.  Besides, she’ll be on Pacific Time next week with her grandkids so she will definitely be in a time zone warp.  She Won Best Table Topics Award.
• TM Tom would rather speak with (interesting) animals than learn all the world’s languages.  He has antipathy for Wally Gator, though, for some reason he chose not to reveal until Level 5 in Pathways.

 

With regard to prepared speeches…

 

• TM Paolo, born in Puglia region (Apulia for gringos) on the heel of the Italian boot (see attached map), reminisced a sotto voce that his mother had a parto difficile, but nothing compared to his move to Miami 25 years ago dreaming of becoming Miami Vice’s “Sonny” Crockett.  Allora, a wife, 6 children and a prosperous clothing business later, we look forward to hearing his many adventures as he lives out his plans.
• TM Marie is whetting our appetite to fill our Club’s upcoming officers’ slate – while cleverly conquering Mt Everest Pathways Level 5.  Her panelists explained that the President has terrific backup, the Secretary only has to show up and have good legs and the VP Ed -in our club at least- does pretty much everything.  Ah… the secret is out!  There are no term limits.  The initials are DTMKB.  She Won Best Speaker Award.

 

As for evaluations….

 

• TM Chris is booking her flight to Puglia as we speak, where she hopes to take a 25-year vacation and live out her dream of being Sofia Loren – she will take her caro marito Giacomo Guld with her, though.  She Won Best Evaluator Award.
• TM Aleta thoroughly enjoyed Moderator of the Day TM Marie’s speech and finds it mathematically impossible to evaluate a 20-minute speech in 2 minutes, darn it.   She remarked that TM Marie’s new haircut is largely accountable for a Level 5 impact.

 

The Word of the Day was

 

ACCOUNTABILITY, n.

 

Quality or state of being accountable; willingness to accept responsibility for one’s actions.

 

Example:  A certain someone takes personal accountability for banana peels carelessly dropped on the ground by irresponsible muppets and hillbillies.

 

 

Recording of this meeting - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AgkkrrxoXjQ

 

 

See you next week!

 

Ana

Recap Writer

Irish Sayings, Enhancing Performances and Finding New Obsessions - an interesting morning at Early Birds Toastmasters

 

 

Dear Members, Guests and Friends,

 

TM Marie started us off with some delightful ‘morning after St. Patrick’s Day” thoughts to ponder…

 

• TM Pam unequivocally stated that insanity is hereditary – you get it from your kids.  Hence her well-earned dang wrinkles and gray hair.
• Newly-inducted TM Randolph confessed that he’s part of a group of four friends – two of them blood cousins – who stay regularly in touch, especially sharing bubbly drinks on St Patrick’s Day.
• TM Chris has an effervescent mind and creates daily expectant anticipation in TM Jim when she announces that she has a great idea.
• TM Paolo’s wife and mother remain cool and calm while handling multitudes of children and grandchildren by drinking lots of Prosecco.
• TM Aleta agrees that the Irish toast “The heck with you, here’s to me” is the best way to handle disagreement with people formerly known as friends.  She Won Best Table Topics Award.
• TM Jose concurs that a good belly laugh is the best cure for any malaise, plus it’s free and contagious. So be ready to laugh in his next speech!

 

 

Then we heard the prepared speeches….

 

• TM Lorena proved that the reason Call Center reps leave us scratching our heads with perplexity is because they face severe disciplinary action due to our stubborn resistance to let them achieve the 5-minute Call Center Average Handle Time (CCAHT).    Get with the program, people!!
• DTM Mary Helen shared with us her new Podcast addiction and encouraged us to find an addiction of our own without wasting any more unfocused time.  She Won Best Speaker Award.

 

As for the evaluations…

 

• TM Jeff praised TM Lorena for her sound structural approach and her clarity and encouraged her to get all her “speech ducks” in a row (ie timer, slide show, effervescent Calming Tea Infusion) during the Toastmaster’s introduction.  He Won Best Evaluator Award.
• TM Aleta was inspired by dear friend and DTM Mary Helen’s call to motivational addiction and suggested that if she slows down a bit she, Aleta, will even be able to understand the topic of the speech.

 

The Word of the Day was

 

EFFERVESCENT, adj.

 

1. (of a liquid) giving off bubbles; fizzy.
2. Vivacious and enthusiastic.

 

Example:

Fizzy alcoholic beverages make people vivacious, enthusiastic and uninhibited, also known as drunk.

 

 

Video Replay link - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hUn_LUguC20

 

 

 

Online Evaluation App: https://toastmost.org/evaluation-forms/

 

 

Early Bird Blog: https://earlybirdtm.blogspot.com/

 

 

See you next week!

 

Ana I.

Recap Writer